Mother . Sister . Lover .
From dimmed down to radical radiance
There are so many aspects that make up a women. So many labels and identities that are acquired to tell the story of A women's life. It is in these identities that value is often placed. But I have come to see women as multi faceted diamonds that become even more radiant in each others presence. And their value can never be solely placed in roles and labels.
My Purpose is to SHINE BRIGHT, and initiate those around me to see themselves as the DIAMONDS that they are.
I haven't always allowed my light to shine. I dimmed myself down, played small and learned to silence my voice. I feared being different because my upbringing was unconventional, and it made me feel ashamed of my roots. Yet, like a moth to a flame, I couldn't stay away from the magnetic pull of creative self expression. This was the doorway into returning home to my soul. But still, I ignored many calls to deepen into myself over the years, still very much afraid to stepping into my full potential. I became the master of shapeshifting, and never stayed long enough in a identity to feel the edges of growth and true self discovery.
Becoming a mother changed everything. it broke me open and brought me to life. I couldn't run from my mother wounds, my shadows, my anger. But like all journeys, I have wandered off path more then staying the course, yet I have found so many lost parts of myself in those wanderings.
I have been many versions of my true self, usually over identifying with every version of myself.
In my youth, I identified as a lost soul, wandering to find myself.
In my early twenties, I identified as not being good enough, but started to feel the radiance within my being.
In my mid twenties I became a mother, and deepened into my identity as a mother and artist. Even though I thought I was finding myself, I was more lost then ever. Chronically overwhelmed and isolated, I was deeply struggling with PPD but convinced myself my experiences was "normal".
In my SATURN RETURN, I found myself inching closer to my purpose, as a community builder and initiator to mothers, but I was met with many conflicts and trauma's in my work and personal relationships. I reached new depths of burn out and loneliness that inched me closer to a breakdown.
In my early thirties I started feeling the call to connect and heal my relationships, mostly with the women in my life. I started a new career in Photography and was finally finding a work/family balance.For the first time in my life I started healing the mother/sister wound, and creating and nurturing healthy relationships with women. But in winter 2019/2020 when my children both were in school for the first time, I reached an all time low seemingly out of no-where.
Que Global pandemic, children returned to their rightful place at home with me, and I started to fully embrace my path and purpose. Over the past 2 years, I have summoned the inner strength and wisdom of my feminine more times then I can count, and have become more grounded, at peace, and aligned then ever. Through studying the cosmo's, deepening into my trauma and wounding, and finding my rightful place in a community of women, I am FINALLY SHINING!